How to Describe Characters in a Story Without Being Boring

Photo by Olga Dieterle

Many writers are able to create characters that leap off the page and stay in your mind for years to come not just because of their story, but also because of their style. Before you start outlining their way of speaking and fashion sense, you need to know what your character's character is like. What is their internal thought process? How would they react to what this person says or what that creature does? And how would your character show their emotions?

When you are writing characters, you're building a person from the inside out, so you need to lay down the foundation of their personality. Determining whether your character is an introvert, extrovert or ambivert will set the tone. Everything in writing is connected and that includes characters. Their personality has a heavy hand in dictating their actions and dialogue choices, although experiences and other factors play a role as well.

In Diane Callahan's video, she mentions the "hidden self" where your darkest secrets are contained. Patrick King, author of Read People Like a Book, discusses this concept, calling it "the shadow self."

Motivation

The shadow self comes from Carl Jung's work. He explains the shadow self as the parts of ourselves that we don't like and have a hard time accepting. These parts are repressed and guilt-laden; they make up the unconscious, but still manifest in many different ways, such as in our dreams and through our emotions. The shadow self can also contain aspects of ourselves that we are taught to dislike, neglect or be ashamed of. People can show one trait but carry the opposite in the shadow self. 

For example, if a person is narcissistic, many assume that this person loves themself, but the truth is that their shadow self has self-hate, and this person cannot accept their appearance. People also unconsciously project their shadow self onto others as a way to disown these parts of themselves and relieve their own pain or discomfort. An intellectual person can very likely have a fear of inferiority if they are called "stupid," so when they get upset, they may insult someone's intellect because it is their own weak spot.

Photo by Mikhail Nilov

Additionally, there is the collective shadow held by a family, community or nation that band together over things that they all don't want to acknowledge; it gets passed down through the generations, through the new members.

A good example of this is the Pixar movie, Turning Red. The protagonist, Mei, is devoted to her mother, but once she discovers that she must bind her newly found red panda spirit inside a talisman to keep the family secret, Mei struggles to go through with this and adhere to her family's beliefs. Mei's mother and extended family pressure her into binding the spirit, which shows that they try to repress this part of their selves that they don't want the world knowing about. It is something that they have done for generations and have a hard time understanding why Mei would feel differently. You can read more into this discussion on Reddit.

In stories, characters experience development. This can consist of having a certain belief or behaving in a certain way and by the end, they have switched to believing or acting the opposite way. With the shadow self, it's the same method. While some may perceive the shadow self as bad and it needs to be cured, that is not the case. What is needed is self-acceptance. According to King, "[...] it's about seeing wholes in a world that is often split, broken, divided, and unconscious" (p. 42). The character will become more self-aware, accept the parts of themselves that they couldn't before and be able to move on with their life to live in a liberated state.

In Diane Callahan's video below, she explores how writers can create captivating characters. It's not about their appearance and daily routine; it's about A.R.C.S.:

• An Attractive Quality
• Room for Growth
• Clear Goals
• Something to Lose

All of these factors make the character more relatable for readers, which allows them to think of these characters as real people. People love the characters from Harry Potter or those of Terry Pratchett; there's The Doctor and Sherlock Holmes, Merida and Rapunzel. 

People are complex because they're motivated by different things, such as trauma, ambition, love and hate, to name a few. But "[o]nce you know what motivates someone, you can start to see their behavior as a natural and logical extension of who they are as a person. You can work backward from their actions to their motivations, and finally to them and who they are as individuals," (p. 32) according to King. It's also a matter of finding out what a person cares about. If they didn't have a nuclear family growing up, it is probably something they will strive to have when they're older, so they will fight for their relationships to stay intact, which may not always be a good thing.

Showing Instead of Telling

Good stories have a blend of showing and telling. Telling is easier because you can state it so bluntly. But if there's too much of it, readers will feel like they're reading a textbook. Showing paints a picture and can be poetic. 

Dusk slumped into place around me, filling the depressions between the undulations and woods of the Milderhurst estate, creeping across the fields and swallowing the light. (The Distant Hours by Kate Morton, p. 42)

Morton shows the readers that dusk is falling by including mentions of how it looks across the woods and fields. Her choice of words, "slumped," "creeping," and "swallowing," creates a clear picture in your mind so that you feel as though you are there. It's much more effective than simply stating it as a fact with one of these examples: "It was dusk at the Milderhurst estate," or "Dusk fell over the Milderhurst estate." 

If you've read or written essays, you'll know that with every statement given, you have to back it up with supportive evidence (I have a major in English Literature; all we did was read (yay!) and write essays (ugh!), which I quickly learned I hated to write.) With characters, showing involves replacing your statement with the visuals of the statement. 

Photo by Khoa Võ

For example, if you have the sentence, "The girl was upset," you can show her anger or hurt using common visuals associated to these emotions. This is where understanding psychology in general and knowing your character will help. The sentence can be: "The girl crossed her arms as she closed her eyes, lifting her nose to the sky." Here, we can dissect body language and facial expressions. Crossing one's arms can mean the person is blocking or not accepting what the other is saying; this is complemented by her closing her eyes to not see whatever it is she doesn't want to see or hear. If the child has the mentality that she is above others (such as her siblings), then raising her nose would demonstrate her belief in her superiority; this could connect to her parents' behavior if they cater to her every wish, strengthening the girl's belief.

The key to reading body language and facial expressions in real life is context. As King says, "No single gesture alone indicates anything. Many psychologists have since pointed out that [body language and facial expressions...] can actually indicate discomfort, nervousness, stress, or tension [...]," (p. 94-95). In writing, you need to clearly demonstrate how your character is feeling because a single gesture, like crossing one arms, can signify different emotions.

Facial Expressions

I love King's book because it provides a lot of great examples for writers, which is what inspired this blog post. It's important to note that each person has their own baseline of gestures and expressions, meaning that one person may habitually bite their lip while thinking whereas it's a sign that another person is telling a lie. In real life, you would need to spend a lot of time with someone and be observant to recognize their baseline. With a character, it's something you can put in early on and have another character point out a change in their behavior later on.

NERVOUSNESS/ANXIETY

Nervousness and anxiety can be conveyed through the following (but is not limited to): 

• A tightening or pulling in of the lips
• Quivering lips or chin
• Having the corners of the mouth twitch towards the ears
• Narrowing eyes
• A furrowed brow
• Non-enjoyment smiling (as Katelyn demonstrates below)

Still from @lady_davidson - Supernatural

Note that one of the actions above is "quivering lips or chin." This is a good example of how this single facial expression has different meanings. While it can represent nervousness, it can also signify sadness, hurt or upset. Young children, for instance, are often written with this facial expression after being reprimanded too harshly, and it is usually coupled with tears welling up in their eyes.

STRESS/DECEIT

People who are stressed don't always exhibit noticeable signs; they could appear calm save for one stress-releasing motion, such as: 

• Rapid eye-blinking
• Twitching (e.g., an eye, cheek, lip, etc.)
• Biting the tongue 
• Touching the face

Many facial expressions, particularly those listed for stressful situations, can also be indicators of deceit, which makes it incredibly hard to determine whether or not a person is lying. King explains that "[n] atural, spontaneous, and genuine expressions of emotion tend to be symmetrical. Fake, forced, or conflicting expressions tend not to be" (p. 98). You can see a representation of this in the image below where Stuart tries to hide his smile, which is only on one side of his face. As mentioned earlier, more than this has to be taken into account to determine deceit. 

Still from @heyitsstuart - Acting Challenge

King explains that deceptive body language contains a sense of tension because the person believes one thing but says something else. As a result, the face and body will show signs of anxiety, closed language and/or distractedness since they are exerting a lot of energy to hold onto the truth while thinking of ways to skirt around it. 

There are various gestures a person uses when they are lying:

• Lifting/Shrugging the shoulders
• Scratching the nose (sometimes this can be an ear)
• Moving/Tilting the head to the side
• Fidgeting
• Avoiding eye contact

The issue with the gestures above is that they are indicators of stress, so it doesn't necessarily mean the person exhibiting this behavior is trying to be deceptive; it could be that they are uncomfortable about the subject matter, they may be trying to hide an emotion or they have a baseline of being unable to look people in the eye because of other experiences. Health issues also come into play, (e.g., someone with Parkinson's Disease may not be able to stay still).

DISAGREEMENT/DISLIKE

Something called the "not face" is something people in various cultures use to show their disagreement or dislike for what someone says and includes some of the following:

• Roll eyes
• Press/Purse lips
• Flutter eyelashes briefly
• Close eyes
• Squirt or narrow eyes
• Sneer

In the images below, you can see Katelyn (as Persephone) show her dislike for Hades when he is badgering her about taking too long. She rolls her eyes in the left image and presses her lips tightly (with a slight possible nose crinkle) in the right image. As mentioned in a previous example, closing the eyes is a way to block what someone says. Additionally, pressing or pursing the lips could be an indicator that the character is preventing themselves from saying something they shouldn't while still demonstrating their irritation or disdain for the other person. 

Stills from @lady_davidson - Persephone vs. Hades

Body Language

In King's book, he mentions the ex-FBI agent Joe Navarro who considered the human body as "a kind of billboard that advertised what a person was thinking," (p. 99). Just like the face, we aren't always aware of what we're revealing, especially when we're caught up in strong emotions and processing information. 

When looking at body language, we need to take the facial expressions into account, as well as context. In the image below, Stuart is standing with his arms crossed; if we couldn't see his expression, we wouldn't know whether his arms are crossed because of fear, anger, or deceit. But with his facial features, we can get a better sense that he is on the defence and/or skeptical of what is being said to him because his features are closed; he's trying to keep his emotions under wraps until he has more information while potentially deceiving the other person. If we bring context into it, we learn that the character he is playing is a teenager being interrogated by a police officer, which explains Stuart's guarded facial expression and defensive body language.

Still from @heyitsstuart - Teen Wolf POV

ATTACKING AND BLOCKING

Body language during an argument can show attacks and blocks. Blocks reflect body protection, such as crossing the arms, turning away or hugging an object to your body, which are common ways to block a threat, whether it's a potential threat (as Katelyn demonstrates below) or an idea with which the person doesn't agree. 

Still from @lady_davidson - Hadestown

Attacks can be demonstrated in the form of the body leaning forward, and if the person is leaning forward on a desk, their arms are probably opened wide to signify assertiveness and dominance. With their arms open wide, they are open to attack, but this is often coupled with indicators of confidence. Another attack gesture is pointing the index finger at the other person, which is often described as "stabbing the air" or as aggressively poking the person. 

On the other side of this, when someone is feeling despair, disappointment or defeat, they exhibit contrasting body language, such as slumped shoulders and arms open and hanging loosely. They are open to further attack, but do not have the strength or will to block.

STRESS AND PACIFYING

When people feel stressed, unsure or even threatened, they unconsciously exhibit pacifying behaviors to soothe themselves (p. 105). This includes: 

• Wringing one's hands (I've seen this one often in books and movies)
• Cradling/Hugging oneself (Common in stories)
• Rubbing one's shoulders (Common in stories)
• Touching one's forehead
• Rubbing one's neck
• Ventilating (e.g., pulling a collar away from the neck) 
• Playing with hair (This is often portrayed by women in shows and movies in my experience)

Playing with one's hair is another gesture with different meanings when the context changes. It can be part of one's behavior when flirting and it can also be a method to occupy one's hand as opposed to a fidget spinner, for instance. In the video below, watch at 00:19-00:22 to see that Stuart (as Gaston) plays with his hair in a stressed state, and if you take his facial expression into account, his eyes are looking down as a way to buy himself time to come up with a response.  

Still from @heyitsstuart - Trend

In Diane Callahan's video below on "How to Show, Not Tell: The Complete Writing Guide," she talks about how it's important to not rely too much on a character's body language alone (see 12:11). Some scenes will require the character to act quickly and adding in body language descriptions or facial expressions would slow the scene down. 

With all of the indicators in this blog post, you can create characters that actually feel like real people to your readers. There is a great deal more to explore in whole body language; there are sounds, such as sighing, which can be interpreted in various ways depending on what a character's face and body is displaying. The use of breath is also a factor to consider in displaying your characters emotions. 

When you start to create your character's background, another aspect to look into is the culture of your character because some body language and facial expressions will mean something different depending on the country where your character is from or where they are currently living or where they will travel to. I recommend reading the texts below to help get you started in creating life-like characters in your story.

Further Reading

Read People Like a Book by Patrick King (Thank you, Stuart, for recommending it!)

The Contempt Facial Expression: Why is it so Harmful in Relationships?

Diane Callahan - Quotidian Writer Youtube Channel

The Thesaurus series for writers by Angela Ackerman and Becca Puglisi (The Emotion Thesaurus, The Emotional Wound Thesaurus, etc.)

Facial Expressions Do Not Reveal Emotions by Lisa Feldman Barett

How to Describe Facial Expressions in Writing by Jules

Scientists Find Facial Expression Used to Show May Be Universal by Anne Green

Need Writing Feedback?

I have a freelance business where I offer editing, beta reading and ARC reading for mysteries, historical fiction and fantasy stories. Feel free to email me about your project at smurphy.writer1@gmail.com. 

Happy reading and writing!